One of the primary keys to success is competence. To be competent, you should have the ability to present your ideas and thoughts to others, and to yourself. And that is what we call confidence. But learning the skills to build confidence is not simple rocket science. It takes a lot of time most especially if you don’t have the assurance that you can do it to make it. Thus, we sometimes need to “fake it until you make it.”
But can you really fake it?
Can You Really Fake Confidence?
There are some things that I have learned on how to be confident for the sake of being one just because you needed to. Here are the 5 steps to confidence:
1) Stand up straight
One of the things that can give you confidence is how you present yourself in front of an audience. Other people would say that you’re confident or not by the way you are you visualizing yourself through your posture. If you have a good posture, it helps you gain confidence.
Otherwise, your bad posture signals others that you are nervous or not prepared at all.
2) Maintain eye contact
We always say that the eyes are the windows to the soul. During a job interview or delivering a speech, maintaining eye contact with the people in front of you. Also, your eyes show sincerity, emotions, truthfulness, and beauty. That is why it is very crucial that you learn how to do eye contact.
It is also important to look straight to other people’s eyes. But if it makes you feel uncomfortable, try to use the technique to fix your eye contact to any parts of the face like the tip of a nose, on the left or right eye and at the center of the forehead. Very simple trick.
Don’t you think it is necessary to smile and show off that beautiful pearly whites? Of course!
People who are confident show so much positivity and happiness. Smile, even though you don’t feel like doing it, is contagious and will make you and others feel better. Smiling makes you look and feel younger too.
As they always say, and I do too, “Turn your frown upside down.”
4) Project your voice
If you have tendencies of shaking or stuttering, try to look for ways on how to make your voice clearer and louder. Always remember that making your voice louder does not mean talking too much. Those are two different things. Practice on how to project your voice so you won’t sound mumbling.
On a conversation, like if there’s someone who is asking you a question, you listen and listen carefully. Pay attention to what the other person is saying and use acoustic feedback and gestures if you agree or disagree with what he said.
5) Self-talk and Practice
Yes, you’ve said it right. Self-talking can help you gain confidence. It is the best way to practice what you wanted to say or check yourself how you sound and how you look every time you respond or react to something. It’s a one-on-one practice session with you in private.
If you’re going to deliver a speech or present yourself on stage, you can practice your lines beforehand by hiding yourself in the washroom or inside your bedroom and practice saying your piece in front of a mirror. If there are words that are difficult for you to say, look for another word and replace them to avoid stuttering.
Here’s a good (and funny) video I’ve seen years ago on YouTube. It’s from a friend of mine, Devon Spence, a Filipino-Swede model, actor and dancer.
As the video progresses, Devon mentioned the video to “be calm, be cool, be brave” which are good tips to get yourself ready and be prepared to face anything that somehow scares you. (Follow Devon Spence on YouTube)
What do you feel about this? Do you have other confidence tips that you want to share? Please do by leaving them in the comment section below.